My time to pout and whine.
Published on June 28, 2004 By Janders In Misc
Lately I have been feeling sorry for myself. Not like a "I hate my life" type of pity,but a more of a "booo-hoo woe is me."



I feel like I am not happy with where I am in life. I know part of this is to do with things I can somewhat control, and I am fine with that. It is the embracing of thigs uncontrorable that drives me to tears.



I am tonight writing about things I can not control, that make my life hard.



First off I am sick. I think often back to what my now husband was told by my parents when he asked my dad permission to propose to me. They said,"Are you sure, Joey will always be sick, and you may have to take care of her." I can't believe he agreed to this burden. I sometimes try so hard to pretend I am super healthy, but it seems to come back and kick me while I am down.



I have Celiac Sprue disease. It is a auto immune disorder with no cure. The only thing you can do is stick to a strict life long diet where you avoind grains, specifically Glidian or Gluten, which is found in wheat oats and grains. When Gluten is injested it creates 2-3 degrees burns on the digestive organs, and eats away at the lining of your small intestine and create ulcers and holes in the lining. It takes years to replace the damage and some is irreversible. Celiacs often suffer from Malnutrtion, Infertility, Chonic stomach problems, Chronic Migranes, Arthritis, loss of bone density, increased cancers, mental health problems and other life long problems.



I suffer from most of these. I am malnurished. I am 5'8 and only weigh 95 pounds. I struggle with infertility. It took a year to get pregnant with my daughter, who we then lost. I always have a stomach ache and throw up at least one day a week.

I have horrible migranes. I once had one that lasted 23 days. For those of you who have had a horrible Migrane, Imagine having that for 23 days. I was in and out of the hospital, on 14 different medications, some that cause my hair to fall out, and some that caused me to throw up for hours straight. I was on one that I had to have my blood monitered because of the high doses, it could make my blood become toxic to my body. I wanted to die.

I have osteo arthritis. I am only 22 and have had it for 2 years. By the age of 15 I had already broken my hip, my wrist, my nose(three times), every toe, and torn the cartlige out of my knee.


I suffer from depression. From high school on I was on small doses of anti-depressents. Yet after the death of my daughter I went down hill. I was diagnosed with Major depressive disorder and post traumatic stress disorder. I spent a week in the hospital after I couldnt get out of bed, stop crying, or sleep due to nightmares of seeing my poor babys lifeless body. I made it through those times, with help from my family, some good and not so good doctors and medication to stop the nightmares.
I feel mentally healthy now. I still take a antidepressent and a pill to help me sleep. But I feel stable. : )


My body feels 80 year old though. My bones ache. I work full time and am on my feet all eight hours work of my day. I am very active. At the end of each work day I cry because I feel like my body is giving out on me. My doctor says I should work less, but I can't do that. I have to take care of my self. We qualify for welfare, Medical assitance and Disability, Yet I take NONE. I work my ass off to pay for my own medical insurance, and bills. I owe two thousand dollars in medical bills which I pick up every extra shift I can to pay my debt.



Why am I writing this? Not for pity. I feel shitty enough that I don't need anyone elses pity. But to show all you welfare taking, baby having , jobless assholes, that your life is pretty good.You should take pride and take care of what you do have, and work your butt off for what you don't! I planned my child, with the ability to care for her, and lost her. Where you keep popping out babies you can't afford. You don't deserve them! You claim disability for being fat. Bullshit, you need the foodstamps less than anyone. Send the money to feed a starving african child. You claim unemp;oyment. Work at McDonalds. It may not be the job you want, but at least your paying your own way through life. I read Dharmas article today and it lit me up. I am sick and tired of these hand outs we are giving. That's all for now.

Comments
on Jun 28, 2004

The good news is that this article that you've written will be well-received.  It is introspective and insightful, and will be worthy of comment.

I think this article will get you "featured" for a day or so.  Have you had a "featured" article before? 

If you haven't, you should be for this one.  (Just go back into the last paragraph and press "Return" a few times, it'll make it easier to read.)

Good job.

on Jun 28, 2004

First off, Janders, I love you.

Secondly, this got an insightful. 

Lastly, everythng you said here is true. 

Bravo!

on Jun 28, 2004
Jamie~ Thank you, I was writing it to vent, but the fact that anyone found it insightful is a big plus.

I have not ever been featured, I mostly just write whats on my mind, which ends up as often not very interesting to anyone but me! But the fact you think it should be is praise enough for me. So thank you.

Dharma~ I love you too. You really inspire me to "let it all hang out". Thank you.
on Jun 29, 2004
I feel for you ...

here is a link that might help you ...

Link

I will say a prayer for you tonight ...

JW

on Jun 29, 2004
You know you can call me. I am always here id you need me. I am so sorry that you got so many of my bad genes. But You also got a lot of great ones. I still wonder if a real regular schedule of sleep, waking and work time would make a diffrence in how you feel. Also I am sure we should not have had chinese on Sunday. I have felt like crap and been bathroom dependant since. Take care of you. You are important to so many of us.
on Jun 29, 2004

bathroom dependant


I'm sorry, I know this is not s humeous thread, but that made me laugh out loud!  That's so much better than saying "I have the runs"!!


Janders......you amaze me with your strength and courage.  I know that one day you will be a wonderful mommy, and I don't think that day is too far off.


Keep on 'letting it all hang out', it's very refreshing!

on Jun 29, 2004

Man, I can relate with you on this one.  I wrote an article awhile back about my health issues (I think it was featured) and how it made me angry that so many people go on disability and whatever for much less.

However, I do also know that there are many people who have it worse off than I do.  I can still work, and I am mobile on my own.  It may be painful at times, but I can still freely do what I want.

Hang in there.  Life is what you make of it.  As Brad the wise one always says- when life hands you lemons, make lemonade I however, have another view- when life hand your lemons, smash them into the ground, jump up and down on them an swear a lot.....but, that's just me

on Jun 29, 2004
Jill Said "You are important to so many of us"

And I COMPLETELY back her up on that.

Lyz stopped by and gave me some pictures from our adventures up north the other day. There are some great ones of us. We = Awesome.

And Karma.. "when life hand your lemons, smash them into the ground, jump up and down on them an swear a lot.....but, that's just me" Whats the deal? Don't like lemonade?
on Jun 29, 2004
You sound like a very courageous person. No one deserves to suffer as you are suffering. I pray that medical research may find a solution, a cure, or just more effective treatments. You have a right to feel resentful of people who don't appreciate what they have and aren't willing to pay for what they don't have. Nevertheless, it's probably best not to dwell on the jerks - it wastes energy! Thanks for posting!
Bob
on Jun 29, 2004
JW~ Thanks for the prayers. I appreciate it.

Jill~ I'm alright, just dealing with my issues and annoyed at people taking advantages of all the stupid handouts. If people who are legit in their disabilities can work and live. Why can't we cut out the handouts all together. I am not against helping people get on the right track, just sick of paying peoples way through life.
on Jun 29, 2004
Karen... uhhh I mean Dharma... You inspired me to let is all out! Glad you find it refreshing.

Karma~ I like the lemonade analogy... tell Brad it's great! Life IS what you make it, but it is theraputic to whine somtimes


"it's probably best not to dwell on the jerks - it wastes energy! "
Bob-I dont feel I dwell on it, I don't actually think about it all the time. But Dharmas wonderful article caused me to get fired up, and I just am sharing how I feel. But thank you for your comments. I appreciate your hope for a cure!
on Jun 30, 2004
I don't know you at all, but I'm familiar with the brutal nature of incurable, wasting diseases and can only tell you that survival is it's own form of self-sustaining nutrition in these situations. Every moment you've endured is more evidence of your resiliance and courage - not your weakness or fear. Take heart in your strength, and in the strength of others.

I extend my compassion and sympathy to you and hope your life grows to be better and brighter. I send you an e-hug.
on Jun 30, 2004

Janders, if you ever want to talk offline, feel free to email me (email address is in my profile).  I have a lot in common with you.  I could easily be on SS disability for many reasons.  I also know the frustration of Auto immune diseases (I have Lupus) and I have had rheumatoid arthritis since I was a teen.  But, I also know that just because the doctors label all that as a medical disability, it only disables you if you let it.

With autoimmune diseases, you have to learn to roll with the punches.  You never know what you will wake up to in the morning, so you just deal with it as it comes.  Arthritis is the same way, especially RA since it "travels".  But you learn to deal with it and you live.  It sounds like you are doing just fine.  I don't see this article as whining.  It's just explaining a very real frustration.  And, I can completely relate.

on Jun 30, 2004
Congrats on being a featured article. Matt and KarmaGirl have said it really well. You do need to roll with the punches. And it is ok to take a day to vent, whine, complain, bitch what ever you want to call it. But then take a look around and realize that we are all blessed. In these blogs I have "met" a whole bunch of people I am starting to care about and caring about others, and having others care about you is what makes life a blessing no matter what ails us.
on Jun 30, 2004
Matt~ Thanks for the hug.

Karma~ Same goes to you my email is jolynda_anderson@hotmail.com

Jill`~Thanks, I was suprised that this article was featured. I feel some of my others(srticles) were a lot better. But hey, I don't run the site, so what do I know!